It's All in the Caption: The Surly Years

There's always that one person in the room that can't help but be a Debbie Downer. Malcontentedness is their mantra and pessimism is their passion. While we don't suggest publicly humiliating them, we do feel some retribution is called for. So, today's installment of "It's All in the Caption" gives us a chance for some friendly ribbing at the expense of the surlier ones among us. As always, we will be using stock photos so nobody gets hurt, but it should be a catharsis, nevertheless.

© Westend61 RF. Image #CRF00856.

Original caption: Boy rejecting banana

Alternate caption: God. I hate you, banana.

Alternate caption: Fruit is not nature's candy. Nice try, moms.

Alternate caption: If you think I am feeding myself, you are sorely mistaken.

© Corbis RF. Image #42-18218546.

Original caption: Sore loser

Alternate caption: Why do they call it Sorry? You don't seem sorry at all. Jerk.

Alternate caption: And thus began Steve's plan for global domination . . . He'll show you! He'll show ALL of you.

Alternate caption: Worst family game night ever.

 

 

© Tetra. Image #TI3600675.

   Original caption: Baby covered in birthday cake

  Alternate caption: What made you think I could handle this!?
 
  Alternate caption: Not exactly the poster child for self control.

  Alternate caption: Frosting up the nose. Instant buzz-kill.


  Click here for more captioning fun.

Top 10 Strange Nude Photos

© Westend61 RM. Image #MD00002.

Some of the strangest stock photos you'll see will use nudity to heighten the weirdness. Though the addition of naked body adds to oddness, these photos would generally be weird without. Nudity just adds that double-take effect. We searched for the visually weird without being disturbing. Here are 10 images that fit the weird bill.

© Pixtal. Image #WE056415.

© EyeCandyPro. Image #ECP001032.

© es Collection. Image #IAAAEL000011.

© Cusp. Image #42-15205178.

© SodaStyle. Image #LAPA00284.

© Tips RM. Image #235WZE05422.

© Boost. Image #BLD021990.

© Superstock. Image #172-8423.

© Radius. Image #600-01694631.

Terrible Greeting Cards

Stock photography sites are an ideal resource when creating greeting cards. They tend to have every angle of every iconic holiday image covered. They also have archival and vintage collections that make for good cards. Most sites will have extensive floral and botanical collections. And what is the next best thing to getting flowers? Getting a card with a picture of flowers. . . or maybe getting candy.

On the other hand, you can also find stock images for those not-so-friendly greeting cards. That topic will be more fun to visit, so that's what we'll cover today. Greeting cards for your enemies. Using road signs as a theme. Enjoy!

© Imagebroker RM. Image #IBLWES01056879.

 Possible text: Just in case you need directions for where I think you should go . . .

OR

I have a feeling you could get there without this clearly marked sign. I'll see you there . . . from Heaven.

© FogstockMIST. Image #006910.

Possible text: Apparently, there is a physical place that accurately describes my feelings towards you.

OR

Directions to you: Take a right at COULDN'TCARELESS, go straight on APATHY for a while. Turn left on SHRUG. Continue on until you pass EHH and DON'TGIVEA$%&!. You are now at WHATEVER. It should look familiar. Or not. Whatever.

Monkey Suits

Who doesn't enjoy a good chimp in a suit photo? Classic humor. On the comedic hierarchy, it falls somewhere above flatulence and slightly below cats falling off things. It hovers just above slipping on a banana peel and just below football to the groin.

Keeping that in  mind, we will explore the diverse uses of stock photos. In this case, we will use photos of chimps in clothing to demonstrate the potential comedic value of stock images, as well as their ability to inspire imaginative back story. This can lead you to your next creative idea, whether it be an ad or a thousand page novel. Or a paragraph about a monkey in a suit.

© Old Visuals. Image #EV004422.

Sam "Banana Peels" Bonney. Career wise-guy with a propensity for danger. Monkey danger. 

He often strolled about with a stern look upon his face and a cigarette dangling from the corner of his mouth, though he never smoked, mainly due to his inability to harness fire. Sam specialized in the smuggling of bootleg termite fishing sticks, making him a wanted man during Prohibition . . .Termite Prohibition.

Despite his tough exterior and occasional incidents of flinging things, he had a heart of gold, which, coupled with his opposable thumbs, made him popular in the community. 

Also, he wore shoes, which is pretty neat.

 See this image and more chimps in this gallery.

A picture is worth a thousand words. But you don't need quite that many. Play along and respond below. 

Slow Cars and Moderately Paced Women

Somewhere along the line, someone came up with idea of matching beautiful women with sleek cars. And like the union of peanut butter and jelly, it proved to be a  mutually beneficial success. The cars look cooler and the women appear sexier. Fast women and fast cars. Cliche? Yes. But does it work? Yes. Much better than slow cars and moderately paced women.

© PicturePress. Image #02200450.

Through the transitive property, using stock images that utilize this formula should add appeal to your website or product. Or perhaps, it will inspire you to come up with the next magical combo.

For research purposes and for your own enjoyment, we have provided some of our favorite stock photos featuring women and automobiles. Or "chicks and cars", for the less refined.;) Visit this gallery to see these and more.

© Superstock. Image #1150-577.

© Flirt. Image #AX042504.

© Rubberball. Image #A01006C.

© Superstock. Image #1051-125B.Yeah. This just happened.

© Flirt. Image #42-21868048.

© Pixtal. Image #WE049425.